catchin up

HI everyone,
It has been such a long time since I have blogged.....and I haven't even loaded any new pictures on the computer to post on here...I have been a little busy....Yesterday was Clarissa's first day of kindergarten..I thought I was OK until I got there and delivered her...then all I could do was cry because my last little baby is gone...she was so ready to go ...she didn't even beg me to stay , she wasn't nervous or anything...it doesn't seem so long ago that she told me she didn't ever want to leave me to go to school ..and now she is....although she only wanted me to take her ..she made Rob stay home..I am not sure why that is..I tried to talk her into it but she refused to let him go to school with her.
The other kids' first day of school was August 27th and the night before was the open house...we went to the open house then out to dinner..we came home and Chi chi was limping...we took her to our neighbor ...who also happens to be our Vet and he told us to go to the office. HE followed us down there..she has a spiral fracture and he leg was broken in three places...there were no puncture wounds or bruises...so we don't know what happened. The break was in a difficult spot to fix so even with 1000's of dollars worth of surgeries it would most likely not be fixable. So we would have to amputate....I didn't know what to do...I was home with the kids..so I told Rob to decide..he opted for "The Sleep Shot" ( that is how we explained it to our kids) The kids were devastated and didn't even want to go to school..I feel guilty killing a dog over a leg.....but what do you do?
SO the next weekend we got a kitten to ease the pain..I refuse to get any more dogs....and a cat is WAY less work...so it was a compromise ...and it worked to make the kids feel better.
My house feels empty without Clarissa during the day...in 11 years I have never had an empty house like this...maybe if the kids were gone for short periods of time or something...but there is a finality to it all..I know she is only 5 and I have many more years...but there is still this little piece of me that knows that things will never be the same and it makes me think about my future and what things will be like without all of the chaos...I will surely miss these days in my life no matter how hectic it sometimes is...I love the noise and the familiar sounds of my home.